The exams are over. I guess thats a good thing.
Although i am kinda pissed that i might have screwed up social theory.
Sigh.
i am good at it you know.
Thats why i am pissed off i might have screwed it up.

Anyway to more important things.

I am not looking forward to China.
Despite the fact that its almost a free tour
and there really isnt much shit expected of us,
I donno, i just dont feel like going.

But then again, if i didnt go, i'll just be wasting away at home.
Might as well see the world instead,
breathe in some polluted air
join in the riots and shit.

but why would i think you would be interested in such random ramblings. let me try to organize my thoughts into something more productive in the next post.

Oh but since this is rather personal and rambling,
I MISS GENEVA! But that stupid bitch has no time for me these days.
I DESPISE U!

Had a sudden flash back of you.

Its a good thing everything's changed.

Places, rooms and beds.

But somehow the feeling of smelling your hair behind closed doors.

That remains.

I wish i had a gazebo to run to.

Not the best of times

Dad and mom are fighting. LOL. Its a big fight with two adults tearing and shit. Its retarded, the tension is sickening at home. I'm glad i'm out of the house.

You see both of them makes sense.
Dad wants to attend the full grandma's 80th bdae celebration.
Mum wants to attend some and continue to open the bookshop later.

ONe accuses another of being unpragmatic
the other accuse back that regarding intentionality of such a discourse.
I'm inclined to endorse the second. Not because I take sides, but because, you live with a person long enough, you start to realize how they treat people they dont like.

On another note,
I've recently met really nice people.
I dont know them well enough, but i like talking to them.

Anyway back again to the sad depressive Joshua hates the world note,
I'm wondering why you only call out for me when you need something. :)
I dont mind being there. I really dont. Its just,
Notice the trend between how you use people and how you run to God when you're feeling fucked up?
I'm not targetting your religious beliefs, its just, there is some truth
in that the whole repentence, confession, sinning cycle,
takes responsibility away from the need to actually commit to doing what is right(debatable concept).

If there is a God and he's really partial, do you think baptism would be the definining difference between me and you?

Oh yes and mindless violence.
I dont think i'll understand it,
but you inflict too much of it.

There are people I am missing in my life.
Most of them dont know about it.
Maybe Gene is right about the whole cherry popping nonsense.
But i do wished some thing did happen.
Its been a long time since small things matter that much.

Josh.

We often hear of regrets of things that were not done.

while we tend to forget the things that we do.

Perhaps the most beautiful thing ever to hold dear,

are those moments when we dont.

And each time I think of those moments of nothingness

it brings me vaguely to a smile

These were moments when we wonder about mundane things,

and wasted away like we should.

How long has it been since you saw angels in clouds?

A certain amount of purity is lost as time passes.

We're no longer innocent as we were.

Sometimes you wish you're younger and things were simpler.

LJS tasted like lobsters when we were 15.

But i guess some things dont change.

You still taste like angels should.